There might be vampires in this post. Possibly.

Well, ladies and gentlemen, we are now several weeks into the semester, and you know what that means. Cookies, you ask? No. Don't be ridiculous. (Okay, fine. I'm willing to share my cookies. Actually I'll pay you to eat some of my cookies. That's a lie; I won't. Just come eat some.) No, getting this far into the semester means that it's time to plan out the rest of our lives, or else we will die alone living under a bridge with no college education and only really crappy snacks. At least that's what I presume will happen. These past couple of weeks, we have been tackling what is probably the easiest of the upcoming life decisions: housing.

Our journey began at the campus housing fair. Actually I didn't go to this, I had pesky commitments like "work" and "class" to attend to, but Jessie, Katie, and Sara did. Apparently at least one apartment complex guaranteed marriage. They brought back many fliers. An intimidatingly large mountain of fliers, in fact. We decided that naturally, the only logical time to look through these fliers was three in the morning on Friday night. Luckily Katie was there to rethink my decisions, as my attention span capped out at about twenty seconds, and I placed at least three options in the "no" pile because they were too complicated to read. Eventually, we narrowed down our options.

And then it was time for apartment hunting! We didn't tour any sketchy, we-might-be-murdered looking places at all! Nope! Not a single one! It also wasn't hailing, and we didn't knock on any doors and ask random strangers to show us their apartments! And none of the places smelled weird at all! And we didn't base our decision at all on how the apartments smelled! That would be ridiculous!

Anyways, we finally decided to live at Glenwood, land of the many dead animals and antler light fixtures. We're irrationally excited about this. Anyway, when contract signing time came, I learned just how efficiently my friends can stalk me. They found my home address, emergency contact information, and social security number all without any input from me. I'm not totally sure how concerned I should be about this. But it's official now; we have a home! Or, you know, we will in like seven months. And it's a beautiful, wonderful place and there's only like one vampire lurking in the path to campus. We'll almost definitely survive. Sara beat him off with my purse the first time, and only minor injuries were sustained.

I hope you all are having a fabulous week! Smerf! (I'm bad at this.)

This week would probably have been more fun if I was drunk. Not that I drink. This title got bad fast.

On a regular basis I threaten to drop out of school to be a hobo and live in a box. I also threaten to move to Chile and join a mariachi band, but that's beside the point. This is a pretty good summary of my semester so far. However, I have recently learned that my current dilemmas are mostly irrelevant as its only a matter of time before dolphins take over the world. What, you hadn't heard about this? You thought 2012 was going to bring an earthquake, or something? How sadly behind of you. As Katie recently informed me, dolphins are alarmingly intelligent, and have been throwing us off the trail for years through such activities as rescuing drowning humans and performing for fish. They can also probably stand up on their tail. Octopi, of course, are also intelligent, but have shorter life spans. Katie does not feel as threatened by octopi.

On a completely unrelated subject, here is my picture of Sara:

P.S. I have just been informed that the word "smerf" must appear in this post. Done.